<JBridge> I worked from 6:00 to 9:30 today. <JBridge> Specifically, 6:00 AM to 9:30 PM. <JBridge> But hey, I'm getting $95 out of the deal. <RocketDude> Wow. Are you feeling okay? <JBridge> I'm feeling a bit exhausted. <RocketDude> A /bit?/ <Haruspex> I'm going to assume you were working as a gigolo. <RocketDude> If he was, then I'd salute his stamina. <JBridge> Well, I was serving a lot of people.
<saladofstones> And so the matous said, and let be known, let us be a dick to orphans because it powers our magecraft, amen <Nova> "I only have to refuse to feed.... twenty-six more starving orphans and I'll advance to Rank 7!" <Nova> "I am so close to Rank 8 I can almost smell it. I think I'll go kick a puppy, that'll get me up there." <saladofstones> "If I cause a baby to cry five more times, I'll get +5 to my magic stat" <JBridge> I thought that'd bump up CHA, if anything. <Nova> "If I steal candy from eleven more babies, I'll get +3 Strength, but I dunno, man. Strength is my dump stat, maybe it'd be better to work on my Magic some more."
<JBridge> Sadly, that's not the first time I've seen mermaid porn with impossible undergarments.
<JBridge> I remember back around my sophomore year in high school, two girls came up to me, and asked if I had fallopian tubes. I said no, and mentioned something about their epidermis showing. <JBridge> Now however, I realize how I SHOULD'VE responded. <JBridge> "Yes. They're not mine, but I DO have them. If you want to see, I could bring the jar in some time." <GuitarBizarre> Yeah. Flirting, disgusting, and witty in one fell swoop <GuitarBizarre> you'd have been knee deep in vagina by the time you turned around <Jayden> Ewwwww <Jayden> As a friendly word of advice; it's not your leg you're supposed to stuff in there <Jayden> If you're knee deep in vagina you're doing it very wrong <GuitarBizarre> Jayden: or horrifically right!
<VerticalPig> ... mmmmmm yes i'm a natural blue where is the ... no i don't find that all too ... my name is Kevin Xiwei and we ... mmmmmmmmfbfbfbfb <VerticalPig> ... blblblblbl tomorrow is the due date and i expect that everyone ... no i will not accept a fish ... come on please stop poking me nggh <VerticalPig> oofow ... no, sir, i don't plan to file a whiplash claim ... this ... sorry i know you like her but i don't think it's going to work out ... ackcough <JBridge> Hm. If VerticalPig is sleep-deprived... <JBridge> VerticalPig: Hey, can I be an op? <VerticalPig> ... someone's calling the cops? um okay but i'm tellin' ya, i ain't done nothin' wrong ... beef and fries i don't understand sir this is a vegan diner ... mmmffllflb <VerticalPig> oh i'm sorry joel you were looking for ... for something weren't you ... uh i slash mode ... umerbafbklj ... slash mode ... ajkfhjk *** VerticalPig sets mode -v JBridge <VerticalPig> okay i think that's right
<JBridge> Should I rant on realism in hentai, or go back to playing my game? <Motoko> JBridge, I'm ashamed to say that I'd like to hear your rant, just to see how depraved you can get! <JBridge> OK. <JBridge> First of all, relationships. <JBridge> I am of the opinion that virgins should never write porn. <Motoko> nononononononono, I didn't actually mean that you should *do* it, JBridge! <JBridge> See, now you have me started! [... five minutes later ...] <JBridge> Anyway, back to Driver: San Francisco. <JBridge> Even though I'm in Marin right now. <Motoko> Why aren't you just taking a car out and driving around the real San Francisco? <Motoko> Such a missed opportunity, JBridge. <ponicalica> Motoko: Are you encouraging JBridge again? <ponicalica> Remember what happened last time you did that? <Motoko> At least he wouldn't be in here talking about porn!
<IllFlower> you know, in fifteen years I'm going to be hearing about how one of the UC campuses has set up a pornography studies department with a certain Joel Button as its chairman <IllFlower> I'll look at the papers out of morbid curiosity and go, "that's the first time I've ever seen the word 'autofellatio' in a citation"
<JBridge> When it comes to porn, I never give up. <JBridge> You know that.
<IllFlower> oh, I was wondering how long it would take for another JBridge porn quote to show up in the QDB queue.
<Charlatan> See, where I get mad is when mods require other mods to play. <Charlatan> Like mod X requiring Skyrim Script Extender. <Charlatan> YOU KNOW WHAT I FEEL LIKE EXTENDING? <Charlatan> MY DICK. <JBridge> I think that requires SKSE, too. <Barcode[out]> Expand dong <Charlatan> Expand dovaahkin <Barcode[out]> Fus roh dong <Charlatan> "Unrelenting force"