<Puffin> hah, my mom's coworker thinks I'm a guy
<General_Barcode> it does that to escape predators

<HederaHelix> I panic whenever I'm getting a B in stuff
<Puffin> you don't need to panic, I don't think
<Puffin> grades don't reflect learning, in my experience 
<Nitya> no, but they do reflect grades.

<Puffin> I find a humanities major and offhandedly mention that I got paid $20,000 to study bugs fucking each other

<Penguin> Could god create a cat so annoying, it could sit on itself?

<Wallabu> Can you possibly point me in the direction of a stats book that doesn't use fucking lobotomized hamsters in every example problem
<Wallabu> God, I hated that book.
<Barcode[PATV]> lobotomized...hamsters
<HederaHelix> Seriously, lobotomized hamsters?
<Nitya> one of my calc books had an exercise about yams in pretty much every section
<blamspam> Yams aren't enough to get a person through calculus.
<HederaHelix> Yams are more socially acceptable a topic than lobotomized hamsters, though...
<HederaHelix> The only way it could be topped is if the examples were of lobotomized hamsters eating yams.
<ColorPrinter> In an economic textbook
<ColorPrinter> The economic impact of lobotomized hamsters eating yams

<Puffin> My mom did a lot of it in college and really enjoyed it
<Puffin> by it, I mean ethnomusicology, and also weed

<blamspam> I'M LIKE A PORNO FLICK <--why does she sing this, this late
<blamspam> my sister thinks it's okay to play Kid Rock songs loudly at 2:00 am
<JackMackerel> What does that even /mean/.
<Puffin> use your imagination
<Nitya> cheaply produced and smeared with unpleasant fluids
<Lin_Chong> It means that they're cheap, ribald, disgusting, and they promote the exploitation of human beings.

<discordant> My coworker and I were talking about how naive the parents were during orientation.
<Komeiji_Koishi> @ship tsukasa/his coworker
<Omnipresence> Komeiji_Koishi: Ship request successful! <3
<Komeiji_Koishi> Where do you work at now, Tsu?
<discordant> ...
<Solstace> ...
<Solstace> That isn't Tzetze.
<Object> :/
<discordant> I am not Tzetze.
<Object> I HAVE BEEN FORSAKEN
<Solstace> You fail forever, Komeiji_Koishi.
<Solstace> FOR FUCKING EVER
<Komeiji_Koishi> What
<Komeiji_Koishi> :<
<Komeiji_Koishi> NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
* Komeiji_Koishi dies
<discordant> You...
<discordant> You deserve death.
<Object> Even my stalker forgets who I am
<Puffin> Quick, Komeji, ship someone else
<Komeiji_Koishi> Object: Can I make up for it with pity rape
<Puffin> Salvage what pride you still can
<TOKAM> Fun fact: "/msg Omnipresence @trace" is your friend.
<Solstace> @ship Komeiji_Koishi/ETERNAL FAILURE
<Omnipresence> Solstace: Ship request successful! <3
<discordant> Or /whois
<Komeiji_Koishi> :<
* Komeiji_Koishi stabs the fuck out of Solstace.
<discordant> *parents
* Solstace lets out one last laugh before collapsing into dust.
*** Solstace quit (Quit: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!)
* Komeiji_Koishi curls up in corner
<discordant> .seen Komeiji_Koishi's honor
<feepbot> discordant: I have not seen Komeiji_Koishi's honor in this channel!

<Generality> Do I want to know what meatspace is?
<RocketDude> Term for real life.
<Puffin> enter the meat dimension! /whoosh/
<SpruceZeus> must... resist... temptation to make dirty joke
<Noimporta> The meat dimension is actually where the characters from fiction who have regeneration abilities get the extra mass from.
<RocketDude> Huh, that makes sense. It's like Hammerspace, but for COD characters.

<Puffin> this is why America has fallen. we're all too good to poop in holes in the backyard.