<Spaghetti> No, y'all don't understand. I told solstace about this chick I was having relations with, and not an hour later things went to hell with her.
<Spaghetti> Thanks, jackass
<Solstace> Oh, sorry :(
<JackMackerel> How bad?
<Spaghetti> REAL FUCKING BAD
<JackMackerel> My condolences.
<Electivirus> ;___;
<Spaghetti> At least she convinced her boyfriend not to kill me.
<Spaghetti> cough
<Electivirus> ...
<JackMackerel> ...
<JackMackerel> Wow.
<Solstace> ....
<TOKAM> ...
<Penguin> I think I've spotted the problem.
*** Electivirus is now known as Sympathy
* Sympathy flies out the window

<Miijhal> http://i.imgur.com/OOVIE.jpg vegeta what are you doing
<Miijhal> that is not proper attire for a school teacher
<Juan|TheWire> also why would you be in super saiyan mode while going for seductive school teacher
<Juan|TheWire> shit don't make sense
<Miijhal> it's to grade papers faster than the eye can see
<Miijhal> he just chills out in the teacher's lounge warping all over the place while graded papers fall around him
<Miijhal> until he encounters that one kids essay
<Miijhal> he scribbles as fast as he can, summoning up a huge dust cloud
<Miijhal> but when it fades away the paper is totally unphased
<Miijhal> because it's not an essay at all but a scantron
<Juan|TheWire> You seem to have given this a frightful amount of thought.

<Abyssinia> He's generally agreed to have invented firefighting, libraries, and prostitution, though.
<Abyssinia> And lightning.
<stiva> I heard he invented thinking.
<Abyssinia> That's actually an urban legend, he just applied for the first American patent on it.

<jseblan> ... and I am now aware of the "moe" in "homoerotic"

<saladofstones> I AM
<saladofstones> ALMOST
<saladofstones> DONE
<saladofstones> RIPPING
<saladofstones> THIS TORRENT
<saladofstones> AND UPLOADING IT
<saladofstones> ONCE THAT IS DONE IM GOING TO FUCKING CUM BUCKETS
<Xeniera> TOO MUCH INFORMATION
<Nitya> calm down
<RocketDude> ...Okay
<BGTB2005> ...you have fun with that

Nitya: It's like the ruins of a building, but with words.

<DograMagra> "Could God make porn so disgusting that he couldn't fap to it?"  Good times.
<GMH> LOL
<GMH> WTF
<GMH> don't go outside, DograMagra, you might get hit by a penis-shaped bolt of lightning. 
<jseblan> Dogra: Maybe he can. The question is: Can he make porn so disgusting a human couldn't fap to it?

<feep> you->pirate = TRUE;
<feep> yar; har; fiddle.de.dee();
<feep> #define alright_to_me = ((being).a_pirate())
<feep> if (pirate.isFree()) do what_you_want(); while (TRUE)
<feep> goto start;

[swapping Nintendo friend codes]
<jseblan> xxxx-xxxx-6699
<Alicia> Best last four digits.
<ponicalica> better than 6969?
<ponicalica> 6969 has *two* happy couples
<jseblan> yeah or you could consider that 6699 is an actual foursome while 6969 they're just each doing their own thing

<Dove> Back
<GuitarBizarre> Dove - Am I to assume you're Black Dove?
<lockon> 'lo dovey
<lockon> only one way to find out
<lockon> ALICE ALICE ALICE?
<Dove> Yeah ALICE!
<lockon> ALIIIIIIICE!
<Dove> Yes, I'm black Dove.
<Dove> ALIIIIIIIIIIIIICEE
<Dove> There.